Sri Lanka Found Missing
June 14, 2009
NEW DELHI- No, you aren’t reading the script from The Twilight Zone. Under suspicions of Somali piracy, the entire country of Sri Lanka has simply vanished. Reported to the United States Geological Survey in Fairbanks, Alaska at around 2235 hours (Aleutian Daylight Time) on Thursday, June 4, the gentleman that informed the Survey described the event as “a black-hole like thing that was not sucking anything in, or gaining any energy.”
So far, claims that the LHC worked in conjunction with the Somali have been refuted by the Swiss and French governments, although Jacques Chirac, who has been exiled to a life with Gorbachev in Crimea, has spoken out. In an interview with partially state run Channel One of Moscow, the ex-president said that “Sarkozy needs to get his act together.”
However, with Sri Lanka most likely being held as ransom, it is no telling how long it will take the pirates to smuggle all of the Maldives and other such islands such as the Seychelles. A 54 trillion dollar price tag has been put on the island, and one nation’s army will be sent to Vladimir Putin will be sent by the nation that attempts to recover Sri Lanka. Calls placed to the Kremlin have not been returned as to what the price tag will be for getting back the nation’s army.
President Obama was informed on the subject, in a special appearance in front of the White House Press Corps today, he expressed outrage, but was not willing to place all 6 million of our armed forces in Putin’s hands, fearing that Putin may run against him in 2012.
As to the fact that the story is surfacing after 10 days of the USGS knowing about it, the President stated that Alaska had been plagued with a storm, hence interfering with media communications out of Fairbanks.
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